Cheating Death

Reeta and I have occasionally discussed what Claire will turn out like as she gets older. Reeta thinks she's going to be a fairly rebellious teen (she's trying to push boundaries now at five, what's this going to be like in eight years?). I'm not sure. I was a really relaxed teenager. Then Reeta usually says something like "I hope she doesn't develop your habit of trying to defy death."

Something I haven't done in years.

And was never my fault in the first place.

I grew up on a potato farm (not the safest place in the world, but far from the most dangerous). And at one point, my dad decided to buy a three wheeler ATV. (This was a few years before they were banned from sale in the US because they were too dangerous). Not too long after that, my uncle was on the Price is Right, and won his showcase showdown. It included a couple of motorcycles, so he sold one, and bought a three wheeler ATV with it.

So I found myself out at the farm one day, racing my cousin. Now, our three wheeler didn't quite have the horsepower that my uncle's did. But I thought that good driving would make up for some of that. It was a simple race - out to a particular point in the field, then back. The finish line was a rut that our circle irrigation system made in the field. A brief explanation - a circle irrigation system is a system of pipes, suspended on a framework with wheels on the bottom. The whole thing rotates around a central point, and waters most of your field. Now, because it's distributing water, it makes the ground soft and muddy as it goes, and these ruts can get pretty deep.

Out we went, my cousin pulling ahead of me. We hit the turn around point, where I gained some ground on my cousin by taking the turn hard and tight - I'm pretty sure I was up on two wheels at that point (something I did often on that three wheeler). Back we came, and my cousin was still pulling out ahead, when all of a sudden he started slowing down.

"I'm winning, I'm winning!" I thought to myself. That's when I looked up and saw the monster rut yawning before my front tire like the veritable jaws of hell. I hit it at full throttle, and bounced what must have been at least three feet straight up in the air. I came down with a bone jarring crash, and bounced back up again, this time wobbling a little in the air. Down it came again, and it rolled. Twice. With me on it the whole time.

When it stopped, I was lying on my side, and the motor had stopped. I think my cousins were a little freaked out. I just rolled it back upright, started it back up, and rode off, the victor. This wasn't the last time I tried cheating death, heck, it wasn't even the last time I did something crazy on that three wheeler (I think my count for crazy "Oh my gosh, I'm gonna die" stunts on that particular machine is ... three? I don't remember any more than that... Total number of death-cheating craziness involving motorized vehicles is... seven? Eight? Something like that.) I mean, Reeta doesn't have anything to worry about there, right?